No Juice.

It's old news but here's a new spin on it. OJ Simpson's sales and Fox TV Interviews with the reprehensible Judith Regan of ReganBooks are canceled. His new book If I Did It, Here's How it Happened is purported to be a tell-all of how he would have committed the 1994 murders of which he was aquitted. Now a lot of people are properly disgusted at the idea that Simpson would write a possible confessional on murdering his wife and her friend for financial benefit, but I have come up with a way to make this work out for nearly everyone... even OJ.

Try this:

1) Meth labs and drug dealers are constantly losing drug money in police raids. Ask for this money to be put into circulation for our purposes here. Say, around $50,000 USD.

2) Buy one or two copies of the book and get together with some friends to type out the entire thing onto a web page while also making a complete .pdf file of the book cover to cover.

3) The Internet. Post it for free so anyone can access it at no cost.

4) Retain a lawyer and pay the copyright infringements for the book (both with the drug money)

Outcome: Everyone gets to read OJ's confessional for free, Nichole Brown's and Ron Goldman's families receive some level of closure despite the poisonous words OJ likely uses in both the interview and book, and he gets paid a small amount of money... in drug money. He'll also get our ire and inspire many a law student in this country who will begin a new campaign to see him convicted for double homicide despite the double jeopardy statute. After all, there's no statute of limitations on murder and the killer's still out there, right?

Don't buy the book, people. Don't watch the show. It should be free and we should hear what the bastard did.

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Later:

This just in, the whole thing's been canned and now the world will have to wonder what was written.